Saturday, November 29, 2014

Unmasked

It was Oct 18,2014 around 7am when I received the phone call that one of the most loved DIVINE HERITAGE CHOIR MEMBERS had just passed away. The voice on the other end of the telephone was one of my best sister/frenz Dawn Taufui. We had just seen each other about 6 hrs prior when we had gone to another one of them many lol SLC 2ND YSA DANCES. Where the men hold up the wall & the ladies dance w/their girlfrenz cuz no one likes to ask the opposite gender to dance.lol Which is totally besides the point. So when I got the call from Dawn, I didn't really take in what she was saying as the words hit my ears from her voice "I don't know if you saw, or if anyone told you but I wanted you to hear it from me, before you see it on facebook, Deej passed away this morning." The rest of the conversation was unreal. My reaction of shock, disbelief, anger & just wanting to make sure I was hearing Dawn right. My only concern was for her &  the rest of her immediate family. All I could do was pray & hope each of them could feel our prayers. Especially since  I was far from ready to seeing any of them on that day or for the days to follow. I never could have see that coming.

Since then I've been feeling much better much more recovered for the loss we've had to accept. In that DJ isn't with us. But through it all discovering a new found strength, on how to endure death in this life. I thought that in losing Dj that I would never want to find my eternal companion. Perhaps because I never really understood what a good man he was unfortunately up until he died.
Unwanted lessons, I've learned from losing him. Now seeing that the good guys shouldn't be overlooked. Those who make an effort to keep standards high, in who I can always be friends with even if our courting doesn't end up in a romantic relationship that would potentially lead to eternal marriage. Bidding Djee farewell has taught me GOOD GUYS MATTER & to

 ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS LOVE GOD MORE THAN WANTING TO FINDING LOVE FROM A MAN. I miss deej everyday but I hold all that I've mustered up ass mistakes with our relationship as pearls of great price moments that to know a man is a real man when he knows how to treat a woman even if he never receives nothing in return. The true example of Christ like Charity. I AM MORE sure now more than ever that I will work for a future spouse who is that type of Christ like love. THE BAR IS SET & there's no compromising to that stature for my eternal progression.

Thanksgiving has passed, Christmas & NEW YEAR'S fast approaching. I am still a work in progress as a sister, daughter, cousin, friend and for some a mentor. I live to unmask my weaknesses so my LORD can turn them into strengths. I lift where I STAND, I dont always please others but when I DO LIFE IS GOOD BECAUSE GOD IS LEADING ME.. MY FAITH IN STRENGTHENED IN HIM DAILY.